Don’t you just love it when your hard
work pays off in unexpected ways?
For months now most of my waking time has
been spent learning, teaching, and writing about the importance of good manners
and how they can help in cross-cultural business dealings. Well, my chickens
came home to roost!
My family and I were recently in Hungary
where good manners are second nature and everyone we encountered was polite to
the point of courtly. While they are polite, I wouldn’t say that older Hungarians
are the most gregarious people, at least not with tourists. So when my family
and I went into a local bakery in Szentendre we were initially greeted politely
but rather coldly. It was a small neighborhood shop, not a ‘café’ and didn’t
appear to focus on tourists. We ordered hot beverages and cake. Our lack of
Hungarian and the owner’s lack of English weren’t too much of an issue, but
outside of ‘coffee’ and ‘tea’, all conversation was limited to pointing and
hand signals. The owner filled our order but really didn’t seem too happy about
us being there… until I went to the counter to pay. All it took was a simply ‘kosonome’
(thank you) and suddenly she was all smiles. I could tell she was actually
delighted! Well, within minutes we were
treated to sample other cakes and with the help of a translation app we were
able to discern what the various fillings were and the makings of each item. I
believe she was just so pleased that a foreigner had taken the (short) time to
learn a simple ‘thank you’ in her language that her whole attitude changed and
she was willing to go the extra mile.
My only regret is we didn’t take a
picture with the shop owner.